Criticism
B. Keith Chapman, President & CEO
Have you ever worked hard on a project and then asked someone what they thought of your work? At some point, you probably even asked the person to be honest with their feedback. If the person praised your work, it likely produced a very satisfying feeling of affirmation. If the person didn’t really like your work and had a few suggestions, the feeling was altogether different. Affirmation is a very powerful emotion. Criticism on the other hand, can be a hard pill to swallow. We have all heard the term constructive criticism. For criticism to be constructive, the critic must have the proper approach and motive. Likewise, the receiver must know how to filter, process and respond to the criticism.
An anonymous author once said, “Don’t mind criticism. If it is untrue, disregard it; if unfair, keep from irritation; if it is ignorant, smile; if it is justified, it is not criticism, learn from it.” The quote correctly suggests that criticism can come in many forms. We should not worry or avoid it. Rather, we should know how to filter, process, and apply when applicable. The author suggests that when criticism is not based on truth the recommendation is to ignore. However, if justified, it creates an opportunity to learn and improve. Understanding how to give and receive criticism is another important skill that can improve your ability to work with and influence people.
The apostle Paul provides some good insight when he was advising his apprentice (Timothy) on how to deal with criticism. 2 Timothy 2:23-25 says, “Again I say, don’t get involved in foolish, ignorant arguments that only start fights. A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth.” It is interesting that Paul starts off by saying, “Again I say…” Seems he felt the need to reiterate or repeat this advice due to people’s lack of understanding or application. Our nature would have most of us doing the exact opposite of this instruction. So, we can all benefit from a good reminder of what is right and effective. Arguments and fighting are never a good way to deal with conflict. They often encourage uncontrolled emotions that produce longstanding bitterness and resentment. Notice that the wise approach is to be kind, patient, and gentle. Equally important, is being committed to truth. Truth is pure and based on facts, not individual perceptions and feelings. Truth is, and will always be, the most successful catalyst for change.
Criticism can be a harsh process that leaves people angry or hurt for extended periods of time. If used incorrectly, it can degrade, embarrass, and humiliate. Conversely, constructive criticism, from one whose desire is to build the other up, can be invaluable. In order to produce a value, there has to be an investment. Investing in others will always produce a return. Despite what others think about you or your work, never underestimate the value that you bring to the team. As an anonymous author said, “Your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.”
Challenge: Whether you are receiving or giving criticism, do it with kindness, patience, and gentleness. Focus on the truth and do not be bothered by the actions of those wishing to degrade and humiliate. Increase your value to the team by being open to learn and receive from others.
Published: June 1, 2020
